Happy 2012 for the Vita?

In true Unofficial Threespeech style, absolutely no summing up the last year, listing games we all know about. 

Instead, here's the thing that strikes me about PS Vita.

See, I think it's a superb bit of kit, I kind of want one, but given I work from home and travel little (and when I do I tend to drive), portable gaming is not really something I need. 

As a 'hardcore gamer' i.e. not a general consumer but a genuine fan of gaming, it's a product I want to see succeed. The online press seem to adore quoting week 1/2 sales figures, predicting gloom and doom - I don't give a monkeys about all that - Sony have put the big guns on the day one releases (Wipeout, Uncharted etc.) and a few more heavy hitters like that, it's going to be hard for a proper gamer not to want one. 

I think we should all buy a Vita - the product of 2012 which deserves our support. Maybe not until the memory cards drop in price though. 

Saints Row The Third - the final challenges

I'm really close to Platinum on SR3 now, not that I'm a trophy whore (just a regular, naked psycho whore as pictured), I only had a few challenges left after ticking through the missions, car thefts and assasinations, so I decided to press on and go for the full set...

The one I (and many other people) messed up on is "Gang Members Taunted" - you have to taunt 50 of them, which I only did 7 times during the game. Once you've got City Takeover, there are no gang members left. There is a couple of ways on XBox, but on PS3 there is only one technique that I've found that works, and actually makes it pretty easy to get...

Start the Mayhem (Easy) activity in the Deckers area.

Jump in the Deckers car and torpedo it away from them, then blow it up. Maybe do this to a couple of cars, so you have 4-5 Deckers shooting at you.

Duck into Friendly Fire to clear your Noteriety, then come out and Taunt - repeat.

You may notice you can't always/often taunt the same Decker, so waste em and get a fresh carload.

When you are down to 15 seconds or so on the activity, Save Game and Load Game. If you restart the activity you lose the challenge gains, so don't do it!

I am three rounds in and getting 7-8 taunts per round, so it really is fairly painless!

[source: HaxAras in the SR3 Forums]

After this I have a bit more Car Torpedo work and a couple of Base Jumps, then I'm home and dry! Next stops, Dead Space 2 and Mass Effect 2 have been waiting for me..

Happy Holidays Gamers

All the best from the team at ThreeSpeech, and remember, a game is for life not just for xmas ;)

Just Where Are We Located?

http://www.ip-adress.com/ip_tracer/threespeech.co.cc

Ever wondered about ThreeSpeech and where we are located in the world, well now i reveal the location of our disused cold war nuclear bunker that we call home. Not what you expected?

3D Converter Unit; Egreat TD20

Well, it finally got customs clearance a couple of days ago, did they think it was a bomb part or something? First thing, bloody small isn't it. But it seems to be well made and i run the power from 5v USB cable from a spare port on the TV. Operation is easy, just click 3D mode button to change output to SBS-H format and my tv automatically switched into 3D mode, Adjust the depth, i set mine at 3 or 4 but it has 6 levels of parallax, and don your active shutter glasses. I know this item is basically un-needed these days as nearly all 3DTV have a built in converter, but mine didn't! grr.. I have to say the effect is rather nice, on par with the Samsung TVs built in unit, takes a few minutes for your eyes to adjust but after that, just fine. QI has never looked better. i ran BBC HD at 1080i into the box and it did a loverly job on the 3D convertion.

Going to test it out on some PS3 titles later, i expect comparable results to my PS2+Virtual FX unit that is now sadly dead due to knackered glasses for it which i am not forking out $100 for for a replacement set. First test will be GT5 as that has built in 3D so it will be easy to compare.

Onlive Running On Tablets

NOT Lollipop Chainsaw

Freckle Bitch releases some pent up PMT the only way she knows how.

Top Of The World, Ma

In every sandbox game it is the law that you must find then get to the highest point in the world. here i am atop the radio tower on the tallest building in Steelport. managed to land on it first attempt, pretty pleased with self. :)

SKYRIM

Starhawk private beta looking tidy..

... but what's this, talking about a private beta publicly? Think I'll lose my beta programme priviliges, or worse - face legal action?

Nope, check this out from Lightbox:

REMINDER: players in all territories are free to publicly discuss the Starhawk Private BETA, post videos, etc. We apologize for any confusion on the matter and the SONY attorneys have modified the EULA to make sure that it accomidates free and open public discussion!

Many Thanks to the SONY PlayStation Legal Team!

This is the most radically engaged PS3 beta I've been part of, the point updates are every couple of days, there is an RSS feed to share update details and balancing stats, Lightbox are pushing for active forum participation, both US and EU forums are up and running.

 The game - we've only got CTF for now, it's radically different from Warhawk, the most noticable at first being the button selections, then the build and battle elements, but as expressed in the run-up, it does feel familiar - "spiritual successor" is dead on. For a very early beta, it's super solid, seemingly lag free and stable, nice accurate long shots, grenades, close quarters - all good. Only critisism so far, looks a little lo-res, this could simply be colour selections though. Oh, and it kept me up till 1am on a work night.

 Now I've 100%'d the Saints Row 3 missions, this beta could soak up a lot of my time...

three60speech: deal of the weekend

Blockbuster £12.95 - Forza Motorsport 3: Ultimate Collection



The Forza 3 Ultimate Collection is the largest Forza entry yet: comprising 500 premium cars with fully modeled cockpits; each completely customizable via upgrades and through Forza’s groundbreaking in-game paint and decal system. Ultimate Collection will also feature all cars and tracks found in the previously released Forza 3 Add-on Packs including:

Motorsports Legends Pack
October Track Pack (Benchmark and Sidewinder tracks)
Hot Holidays Pack
Autoweek Car Show Pack
Nürburgring Grand Prix Circuit Track pack
Jalopnik Car Pack
Road & Track Car Pack
Exotic Car Pack
Summer Velocity Pack
World Class Car Pack
Forza Motorsport 3 Ultimate Collection will also include seven new car models, including:

Lancia 037 Stradale
Jaguar D-Type
Plymouth Cuda
Audi R8 5.2 FSI Quattro
Audi TT RS Coupe
Audi R15 TDI
Porsche 550A Spyder

The world’s best automobiles combine with some of racing’s most famous circuits in Forza 3 Ultimate Collection; the game will have more than 100 track layouts to race on, including Laguna Seca, Tsukuba, Road America, as well as endurance tracks like Le Mans de la Sarthe and the Nürburgring Nordschleife.

It's going to take me ages to download ALL that content, nice to see it's not a code redeem job either (except TopGear theme). I loaded the game up and got a bunch of messsages from Turn 10, i clicked the links and it took me to the Store and a whole list of stuff to grab all for nada.

Best part is i have now got my PS2 Logitech Rally wheel running on the Xbox360 along with the pedals working, had a bit of a problem with that a while back, as i found the correct set-up in the Forza Options menu, why they can't has a straight button customisation option in this day and age i'll never know, but the pedals are 'A' and 'X' buttons using the converter. I turned the wheel sensitivity up to max and it's all good.

Had to be careful though in Blockbuster as the Ultimate Collection was mixed in and priced up with the normal versions.

Saints Row The Third: Playing It My Way

Freedom, Fun, F**king About.. From the first time the game started to when i turned the console off many hours later i totally enjoyed myself. I played this with my tongue firmly stuck in my cheek and a grin on my face. There was a point when the crew were flying over a penthouse about to do an assault when my character gets asked 'can you see anything?' and i reply 'yeah, there's someone in my pool!' before leaping out of the helicopter to parachute in and start blazing. That moment has summed up the game so far.

If you are not worried about your Trophy collection then the cheats list i posted opens up a whole new world of possibilities, i have two save files on the go now, one for straight playing, the other for balls out daft. I finished off the night driving around a zombie infested Steelport in a tank with 3 hotties in a purple scoutcar in tow sporting uzis, this had the side effect so that when you get a phonecall for a gang side mission (horde mode type gameplay) the zombies started attacking the other gang too and all shit would break lose.

talking of 'Whored Mode' this is a nice solid addition entered from the main menu, i wouldn't play it with the kids mr jimmy! ;) i gave it a go and got to wave 6 first attempt.

Haven't played any co-op yet as i'm waiting for more news on the fact PS3 owners will be able to download Saints Row 2 next week sometime until Feb when they redeem their in box code.

Initially the game feels different to SR2, the customisation is not as in-depth but that does not matter much, not as in the character so much as the fact there are only a couple of store outlets to buy new stuff from, and most of it seems to have been in the free Initiation Station downloaded from the PSN Store. There seems to be less vehicle types too. You can buy up shops, and buildings to gain an hourly income, this will come in handy to keep you in bullets and up grading your weapons.. an incendary round duel weilding uzi set-up anyone?

Early days yet but it looks like The Saints are on a mission, where that mission will lead who knows. But i'm pretty sure i'm gonna have a damn good laugh finding out.

Saints Row The Third - day one verdict

A necessary post given our own Mr Mobiletone is most likely at work and wondering...

I've had a couple of hours, and it's really really good.

One thing I expect in a modern game is a clear and responsive user interface, not just the menus but extending to the way cut scenes work. SR3 does not need the cut scenes skipped to get in the action, as the mission details are explained while you play. When you fail/complete a mission, the screens look great and are quick and get the point across in a satisfying manner. They really worked on this 'keep the player having fun' factor and IT DOES IT BETTER THAN ANY OTHER GAME I'VE PLAYED.

Sandbox is an overused word, as rarely do you feel you can go anywhere and do anything. Grand Theft Auto started it then lost the plot somewhat, Saints Row plagiarised so much, but here they've improved on the format in almost every respect. I kid you not. For example:

• Talk about straight into the action. No spoiler, but a top first mission in seconds of starting!
• Guns are fun, accurate, vary well, zoom works well, ammo is no tighter than necessary but not free etc.
• Stealing cars has a wide variety of animations and outcomes, right up to immediate steals by jumping through windscreens etc.
• After 2-3 missions and a couple of sides I was genuinely spoilt for choice - a round of Genki (OMG that is amazing - a murdering game show against the clock though fire traps etc - very 'Running Man'), assassinations, drug running, gang killing events - all without needing to drive for 5 minutes to get there. Great map, great smartphone system for finding/selecting everything - wonderful.
• Cars handle even better than before, fast, easy yet mental too. Hazah! 
• Good story line so far, no sign of letting up. 

Any downsides?

• I don't like the hair customisations, a few more would have been good. I wanted to recreate my SR2 character and I can't get very close at all. 
• I can't play a game with a 4 foot long dildo weapon with my 11 year old daughter. 

Enjoy...

Skyrim Broken on PS3 (360 version fine!)

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim is a big game. Players will want to save their progress along the way. And this is apparently causing players problems on the PS3 and making some call the game "broken".

After Skyrim gamesave files surpass 5MB in the PS3 version, many claim to experience lag and stability issues. "Such as framerate issues, poor rendering, shoddy loading and non interactions fro finishing quests/cutting wood etc," wrote gamer PurpleHaze on the game's official forums.

"I can't finish ANY quest and i can't buy from ANY trader/npc and i can only talk to them after some laggy button pressing," continued PurpleHaze. So my gamesave is now 6mb (how i don't know since i couldn't buy/sell/talk or complete quests) and the LAG and framerate issue is so bad at this point, the game isn't worh restarting."

PurpleHaze, whose issues started after hitting 5.3MB, isn't alone, with other players experiencing similar slowdown once their save files pass the neighborhood of 5MB~6MB (some are reporting problems after reaching 10MB).

"My file size is growing constantly, and fast," wrote player AMG on the game's forums. "It's already well over 3mb in size and I've only played for 3hrs."

The current fix is to restart the system, which makes Skyrim playable. However, after an hour or two of play, the game once again apparently becomes laggy.

This issue does not seem to affect the Xbox 360 version nor the PC version. Even gamers with plenty of available PS3 hard drive space are having problems.

"It does not take long for the save file to exceed 6MB, roughly 16 hours for me, so playing the game in any sort of depth will become very troublesome," wrote Kotaku reader Toby.

Players are calling the PS3 version "broken".

Bethesda, Skyrim's developer, is no stranger to PS3 game issues. The PlayStation 3 version of Bethesda's Fallout 3 also suffered a whole host of PS3 problems, including this.

When The Saints Go Marching In

Dispatch estimate:15 Nov 2011 - 16 Nov 2011



see you all in Steelport biatches! Adios. it's been a blast.

GTA V: Trailer Breakdown

Initiation Station Custom Na'vi

Definitely NSFW 3D Custom Girl

I've put my code in...

OK, Battlefield 3 (PS3) is a great game - I've only spent an hour or two on campaign mode and a few goes on multi-player, so far extremely happy with game and the Frostbite 2 engine - this looks amazing and plays a treat...

But EA WTF is this obsession with ramming your other services down my neck, in such a blatant capitalist exploit the consumer manner? Here's the thing:

1. As expected, you can't play online until you enter the 'online pass' code included in the box. This lowers your resell value, as second users have to buy an online pass from the PSN Store for a few quid. Actually I understand and support this, as the gaming industry makes zero out of second hand title whilst expected to maintain servers etc. however:
   
2. The online pass is in the PSN Store for £7.99, that's pretty damn high. The box proudly displays "WINNER OF BEST ONLINE MULTIPLAYER", yet the paragraph explaining the need for the online pass is in letters just 1mm high -talk about small print! Sony's PSN Pass idea sounds pretty good to me now, a nice clear recognisable branded logo making it clear to preowned purchasers what they are and are not getting. Rental companies need to be on the ball to inform their customers about this stuff, I bet they are not there yet.
   
3. I ordered the 'Physical Warfare Pack' which was the same price from Gamestation as the standard, giveing a few unlocks. The code for this needs to be entered in the PS3 Account Management, despite the online pass code being unlockable in the game.  So I had to quit out, do the thing and reload. It's not clear if I have the items as the multiplayer screens still confuse me - if they confuse me, they'll confuse a lot of people - I've played games before you know.
   
4. The Battlelog needs you to register on the Origin wesite. I did this for the beta, but nothing carried over. This is quite a nice feature, but why are these privacy settings open by default - people can find me by email, facebook etc. cmon guys this is 2011, lock down and give options to open, everyone knows that. It's another username and password to remember.
   
5. In the box there is another leaflet "YOU'RE READY TO UNLOCK THE M1911 PISTOL FOR MULTIPLAYER!". I am? For this I had to reuse the Origin login on the EA Gunclub website (good job I wrote the password down) and here I'm presented with a site similar to Origin, but different and a bit crap. Why am I here? None of my friends are. This is weird, why not do all this on Origin? Again, I don't know if I've succeeded in unlocking this gun either.
   
6. Ah, Origin. EA want to make money by doing their own version of Steam, denying Steam there titles and luring others over to the dark side (I believe Saints Row 3 PC is coming to Origin).  I don't run games on my PC, but now having used the Origin site to get my Battlelog running, it's asking to install a Battlefield Browser plugin - which is now showing in my PC System Tray. What?
   
7. and again! It wants to install Origin full client, I've gone for it to remove the annoying icon - now that's in the system tray too? Can I have my PC back now please? 

Well I think this is ridiculous, I want to play the game I bought, not spend more time entering codes and installing sw I don't want. Mildly pissed off now. 

you wait all day then three come along at once...

It's started, today reviews are coming in for Battlefield 3, Uncharted 3 and Batman Arkham City - all are looking very tidy indeed. 

I've gone for the first two - Gamestation have shipped my BF3 as of last night, Uncharted coming from Sainsburys online - Batman relegated to 'rent it' status at some later point. 

The BF3 reviews are PC only at present, but nothing to worry about methinks. Uncharted is sounding very special indeed. Batman also good, I enjoyed the first one - the shelves at Asda nearly pulled me into an impulse purchase yesterday, but I resisted in favour of one of those huge pizzas they do.. 

I has a gamertag

The lure of Forza4 and Halo:CE reworked and running in 3D was too much of a temptation (or so i shall keep telling myself to justify another console -heh-) i should think i'll get myself a secondhand box sometime in the next few weeks, nice to see no one had already nabbed my user name.

Battlefield 3 Just Got PWND

4 weeks to launch biatches.

Syndicate: New Gameplay Footage

And in protest of one of my childhoods favorite games being buttraped i'm not going to post it up. It's the same as they did with Front Mission and several others lately. Well, fuck me sideways, if i really want to play yet another FPS i'm sure i'm not short of choice these days. What is the problem devs and studios have with being true to the original, do they really miss what made the original brilliant? or are they just looking at the £s signs they can reap from todays gamers..

Thank You For All The Racing GT5

DCU: Online Goes Free2Play

Become a legendary fighter alongside DC Comics icons for free on PS3.

DC Universe Online on PlayStation 3 lets you assume extraordinary powers and become a hero or a villain in a high energy action title that delivers a fast-paced adventure experience. Beginning in late October 2011, you will be able to download and access DC Universe Online for free from PlayStation Store.

What does free-to-play mean?
Free-to-play means you can enjoy the exciting world of DC Universe Online at no cost. You can buy additional items or features that best fit your style of play, or even get premium access to game content by purchasing a subscription.

It's up to you how you want to play the game. Free-to-play also means you do not have to purchase the game; you simply download it directly from PlayStation Store and start.

If i had payed for this when it came out and been paying a sub to play it i would be feeling rather pissed off at this news. But free i can deal with, should kill a couple of hours on a wet weekend at some point.

Super Mario Bros to the Drummers Beat

Thanks to BlendedGoldfish for the find!

RIP Steve Jobs. A Visionary.

Gran Turismo 5 Spec 2.0

Kazunori Yamauchi has been sharing a boatload of new details via Twitter this morning on the previously announced Gran Turismo 5 Spec 2.0 Update coming later this month (next week). Here’s an overview of what we can expect from 2.0, which will be made available to everyone for free:

Simplified interior views added to all standard cars.
User control of the weather change feature.
Settings sheet which allows you to save multiple car settings.
New Spec 2.0 opening movie.
Improved UI response and usability.
Replay forward/rewind.
Mid-race save feature for endurance races.
Expanded online lounge features (narrowing down car types, shuffle races…).
Expanded Photo Travel features (you can now take photos of cars together with your avatar).
Added “NASCAR Pit Scene” stage to Photo Travel.
Added 11 new 2011 NASCAR models.
Added the Nissan GT-R N24 Schulze Motorsport (the car in which Kazunori contested the 2011 Nurburgring 24 Hours).
Improved physics and artificial intelligence.
Support for the Logitech G25/G27 steering wheel.

Finally i can do the 24hr races and 100% the game. *happy bunny face*

status: Approved

Public Service Announcement

What To Do With Those Old Drives

Battlefield 3 comparation PC vs. Playstation3 Split Screen

This is really well done, very impressed. Still getting PS3 version though.

Long Live Play - something Wednesday week

Ashes to Ashes, Dust, to Dust.

like some mad hybrid between Lemmings and an old Molyneux game From Dust is a bit of a gem on the PSN. I downloaded the demo and after a play around got the full game, the premise is basic, get your little tribes people to make villages and get to the exit portal, but all the while you battle against the forces of nature, so far Tusmanis and Volcanos and Water. You have certain things you can do to progress your tribe by unlocking hidden knowledge, these come about by reforesting percentage of map etc. Once you have a nice stable map for your tribe you can get creative and build lagoons, mountains rivers and just chill out with it before deciding to advance to the next level. Spent a good few hours on Sunday evening playing with this title and enjoyed myself totally.

status: approved.

PS3 Attitude takes a peek at EA Sports' exciting SSX reboot

SSX Hands on over at PS3 Attitude

Clans and Forums and stuff

OK one reason I got involved with blogging was to meet and play other gamers online, but I've not been getting on that well with it. While most of the lurkers on U3S are on my friends list, I don't meet them on PSN very often.

Taking KZ3 as an example, this game is at it's best with a well organised clan, headsets all round, meet in the lobby for tactics, then go get 'em. Lovely....

... only many players don't get this together. Some sure only dip in and out, but there are other games more suited to this, you can't beat an organised clan side with an unorganised but more skilled team, not usually. When I cracked open KZ3 beta then release, I swiftly went about setting up a U3S clan, but with only one or two takers for one or two days, that wan't up to it.

There was then the GDNA clan, this was fine for a while and fanpages did a good job in rallying a sizable membership. Fun was had on a very few ad hoc nights, but no clan games or regular meet times, so I looked elsewhere.

Next up TSAN. Regular meets Mon and Fri evenings were on, and about 8 attendees each time, but this was mostly bootcamps i.e. training for a clan game, although the one clan game organised I couldn't make, and the organiser has gone all quiet.

I'm jumping KS3 clan again, I'm trying out GoM (Grumpy Old Men). I like the look of this, hundreds of older UK gamers, skill not important, a good clan website (liking the enjin) and lots of games, PS3 only.

Cross fingers I may get a few decent games before Battlefield 3 launches, then start that one with a good crew around me.

What say you lot, who do you game with, what sites do you chat on?

Best game ever gets new best trailer

Source: EWWW

Uncharted 3 Sand Art

Don't know if you guys have seen this. Stolen from the Eww blog. I thought it was pretty awesome and helps get us hyped up for the Uncharted 3 release! Drake I've missed you.

We're Just Bitches with Keyboards

Deux Ex: Human Revolution

The Escapist : Zero Punctuation : Deus Ex: Human Revolution

Dragon Quest X Footage

Now we will finally have a reason to buy a Wii (also for WiiU). I know you probably haven't touched a DQ game, the last PS one was way back on the PS2, but DQIX on the NDS was a work of wonderfulness, the localisation team did a top job and it had some genuinely LoL humour in it, plus character customisation was done properly, as in your on screen character actually changed items rather than just numbers on a stat' page. My only concern is that this game is being handled by Squenix.. sad smiley face, but judging from the footage alone it looks true to the series. role on 2013 when we'll probably get it here. heh.

zomb nom nom

It may not be fasionable to say so, but I want MORE zombie games.

oh look... out Friday, I'm going preowned in the winter when it's darker earlier.

He's Baaaaaaaaaack!!11!!one

Deux Ex: Broken Mirror

Just bleeding perfect, happy hours ahead

Pixel Junk deliver the goods again, really looking forward to this. I see in this short clip, elements of Scramble, Moon Cresta (did you see this?), R-Type, Nemesis, even their own PJ Shooter - wonderful. LOVE the incredibly simple title, Sidescroller, genius.

Lollipop... Oh God Yes.

Battlefield 3 owns the world in 2 mins

Yes it's high end PC footage, but is the same game heading to PS3 folks. Just WANT.

Crash Test Dummies.

The AGM Could Have Gone Better

Unofficial Threespeech Now Part of 'Saints Ultor Media Group'.



Y'know, i wonder when we send the first colonists to Mars? what, you haven't played the Red Faction Series.. the connections are rather amusing between these two games. This universe has some messed up canon.

Warhammer 40,000: Kill Team

A nifty twin stick shooter that should stave off the itch until the full Warhammer game comes out. Though technically that class of Space Marine shouldn't be able to run.. [/pedant]

In other news, Team Threespeech Motorsports Division, yes, you mean you didn't know we had one? ;) Well The 24hr Le Mans race started this morning at 8am and i kicked the team out of bed to get the car up and running. A nice silver arrow in the form of the Sauber Mercedes C9 (standard) running RM front RH rear and a notch up on the braking. After 6 laps the team has nudged into first place and is doing a sterling job holding off the Pescarolos and Audi R8 Race cars that make up the next 5 places. Early days but i think we're in with a good chance of winning.

Post 700: Seriously NSFW

New BBC iPlayer on PS3 live now

Just checked, hit iPlayer on PS3 and the new version update is there. It's way better, proper app now not a browser based thing, you can select a show while watching one, also favourites makes following a series really easy. Good job Auntie Beeb.

Rage looking nice and headshotty

TIDY new Rage trailer, come and get it:

LULZSEC Spokesman Chooses Own Punishment

Up, Up and Awayyyyyyyy

GTAIV on PC is pretty modtastic, this made me chuckle:

Source: PC Gamer

Shooter with strategic elements - pretty damn confident we've cracked it

Yeah, I'm blabbing on about Starhawk again. I don't get on with strategy games on the whole, but I do like more depth in my shooters, the Starhawk panel once again reiterated the unique approach Lightbox have taken, i.e. lots of TLC and detail in getting the game mechanics right over and above the elements the industry runs away with too often i.e. marketing, styling, story etc. Because these can always go on top of a game engine anyway.

If only all games were made this way. I'm all about 2012 and Starhawk.

Source: Official US PS Blog

Following Trails Of Blood

The Escapist : Zero Punctuation : L.A. Noire

L.A. Noire

OK, so it's been a while since i posted here, shit happens, real life, staying over the missus's a lot (she has no intarwebs). But she has gone camping this week so i'm back in the Unofficial bunker.. What i decided to do was sit down with L.A. Noire and get into this game, though i use the term 'game' in the loosest possible term here, it's more of an interactive experience where you will follow the storyline, why so? because if you decide to wander off and explore the sandbox city you will find abso-facking-lutely nothing to do. C'mon, this is a Rockstar game, a sandbox, but it's so deviod of anything it makes the small kittens cry. Oh sorry, you can find 'hidden' cars and maybe get to a street crime, of which there are only 40, if you're lucky.
Cole Phelps.. a man lacking in any sort of personality, which wouldn't be so bad if you could craft him in your own image, but no, he's about as interesting as a wet rag and plays it all by the book. You will investigate the crimes with him and that's it. Despite being a Rockstar game you can't even get your gun out and relieve the bordom by offing a few citizens in a rage fueled killing spree..
The other major failing is the fact you can't fail the game, hell, i completed cases getting only 1 of the questions right and finding half the clues. I keep getting the feeling that i'm only going through the motions, go here, ask a few questions, drive there look at some stuff, repeat until case solved, it's not hard. i never once so far have felt that i am in control of the game and i'm only jabbing a few buttons to advance the storyline.
Somewhat like i felt playing Heavy Rain...

Rockstar have been making progressively worse games lately, it started with GTAIV only to be redeemed by The Lost And Damned DLC, Red Dead and the worms had started eating their way in, and now here we are at LA Noire wandering around an authentic 1940's box wondering if there is actually something, anything to do. Pretty graphics do not a good game make.

When Reality Goes All GT5

Another Cop-Out Of A Post

To All The Code Monkies

Anyone using Steam?

As you know probably, Portal 2 comes with a free licence for the PC version on Steam. I've always kept PCs for work and consoles for play, but with a less techy role these days I'm more inclined to play on my pretty Sony Vaio, which has a fair stab at running Portal 2 if you switch off the fancy rendering.

Steam is really nice, lots of bargains on there at the moment as well. Team Fortress 2 is free now too, result, downloading now. If you lot want to add me on Steam, it's psn_mrjimmy.

Saints Row: The 3rd In game footage

Burnout, OutLand

Two games are subject of the day, first up:

I took Burnout Paradise to Platinum trophy on disc long ago, my disc is lent out so grabbed the free PSN download (master stroke of Sony's giving this away with the free month of Plus, loads will go for the £15 DLC package if they've got any sense).

Annoyed to learn the disc game save is not compatible with the PSN version, but then started to have mucho good time going through it all again. This game really is amazing, those out there who have not tried it, you HAVE to grab this now while it's free, it is one of the best games of recent years.

http://www.criteriongames.com/burnout/paradise/myparadise/ is very useful for completing the game, a cool tool analyses your game save and shows you whats left to go on a tidy map.

Next up, OutLand, £7.99 on PSN. As a major fan of Housemarque, I knew they had this coming, yet completely missed it on PSN until today, it's been up for a week I think. The logo put me off I think. Anyway, grab the demo version and try it, I likey. Visually it's the lovechild of Ico and Patapon, but much better than both in many ways. Excellent, fast paced and original platformer, yummy.

Winnitron

Saw this on Kotaku and love the project, free to play arcade machines, networked, webcamming players, posting stats etc. - awesome. Will be finishing off my MAME cabinet this weekend so hold tight for a video of that too.

Winnitron Indie Game Arcade Network: "Arcade Graveyard" from Kert Gartner on Vimeo.

Want to create a Winnitron Indie Game Arcade Machine in your city? Get involved today!

Visit winnitron.ca & bitcollective.ca forums to find out how you can grow the indie game community in your city!

This video was shot at Allied Coin, the larger of the "Arcade Graveyards" in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. For more information about this hidden gem, and more information on using the Panasonic GH2 for Visual Effects work, check out this "behind the scenes" blog post here

Music by Jim Guthrie jimguthrie.org

More Photos from the Arcade Graveyard can be found here flickr stream

LA Noire: Epic MEH!

On the other hand, i finished playing through BRiNK as le resistance yesterday evening, am currently at Lv11 and perking my Soldier/Engineer classes. I get the feeling this is a bit of a marmite game, but i really like it. I knew that when i kept getting shafted on one particular level, respawning back in and getting made dead again and spawning again wanting revenge! You don't really need to swop over classes during a level as your objective wheel will spit out stuff for your character to aim for. The game has a metric ton of replay value as you're always after that elusive 3 star rating and XP, perks are bought with combat coins and can be resold if you mess up your skill trees to remap them. The gameplay is run and gun and the bastards soak up bullets like Helghast on hardcore mode, mind that could have been due to others wearing kevlar, but you can equip armour piercing rounds -heheh- Any level can be played in freemode with your own settings, there are challenge levels to unlock weapon customisation gear, XPs earned unlock character customisation stuff. Also worth a mention is the buffs you can give others in your team, this encourages close teamwork as you can hand out ammo, damage perks, medi packs etc. Overall, if you liked the objective play in QuakeWars etc, i think you'll love the tight gameplay in BRiNK.

Puppies On The Glass

Right, we've had the games now make with the Booth Babes pics, Who floated your boat at this years show? My vote goes to the Saints Row carwash crew.

E3 overload

I'm sure you are all over the E3 feeds from Kotaku etc, suggest we post up our favourites on this thread. So far:

EA have put their top videos here http://www.origin.com/uk/ including the particularly tasty Battlefield 3, SSX and NFS latest vids. A well spent 10 mins watching those.

The Official Sony Blog has a nice few postings, covering PSP -> NGP -> official name = Playstation Vita (daft name, it's a bloody PSP isn't it?), Unchartered 3 and... Dust 514, which looks mighty fine.

Can't be bothered to dig more, add your favs please:

Store is up, but not

The Playstation Store is up, but very hard to get anything out of it, lots of timeout errors. Probably due to half term keenness?

Posting from Blogger app on Android

Killzone 3 double XP this weekend

I only had a couple of hours last double XP weekend, but it made a massive difference, partly because it was really easy to get matched to a good game where I could be awesome...

and guess what, a WORLDWIDE double XP weekend is now imminent so the Japanese PSN can stretch it's new legs! UK time, Friday 5pm through to Monday 10am. Go get those valuable unlock points!

Also... clan GDNA hasn't really kicked off for KZ3, so I'm hoping something happens soon, otherwise I'm going to look for a more active one - anyone interested in either sprucing up GDNA or a.n.other?

StarHawk Gameplay Footage

Was The Rapture Good For You?

My old world ended, and a new one began. So i guess those crazy x-tians were right in one way. Also we went to see Attack The Block, pretty good film, totally British, depends on your tolerance of dubious landan yoof speek i guess and most of teh action is in the extended trailer, worth killing a couple of hours for though. has some genuine LOL moments too.

Not been gaming much, well, except for a bit of Halo. yeah, i have gone over to the dark side :) Feeling pangs of guilt for not getting on with Mass Effect 2, damn box is getting dusty, had just started to get into that when RealLife(tm,(c) UTS) got in the way. But the builders are gone, we have new furniture, the plaster stayed on the wall, and the singularity has been removed from teh backroom. It's all forwards from here on in. 2011 is turning out to be an interesting year so far.

ps: for those not on ArseBok, Me and Rach' are now all sorts of official an shit ;)

Brink:

Breast Physics

Kazuo Hirai also said something about PSN being back up, so best we update our firmwares, change our passwords and walk back into the abyss that is online gaming. Our time spend here in the realms of the fleshy mortals has come to an end, we must return to our digital forms, pick up our chainguns, call in a nuke strike, turn the router back on and say goodbye to DIY sundays, walks by the river, moonlite drinks in the countryside, meals out and going to art shows.

Reality, over-rated if you ask me :)

but seriously, it was nice to have the chance to go back to pre 2007 life. Maybe now we can have a better game/life balance. Anyway, the missus is in bed and i'm supposed to be making breakfast...

It's real - loads on Starhawk

Oh yes indeedy, now Blogger is back up (I think it caught a bit of PSNitus yesterday, couldn't login) I can catch up with the rest of the interweb to joyfully caw:

Starhawk! Yee - freekin' Hawwwww!!

The Good News:

• "Starhawk is the spiritual successor to Warhawk". It's looks to have kept all the good about Warhawk, thrown away the entire (lack of) back story and given us a lot of new direction, including:
  
  
• Build and Battle - the map is a canvas, a fast, visceral system lets the player drop buildings on the map where they want them. Warhawk was unique in it's frantic yet strategic freedom, this is not lost on LightBox, they've multiplied up the map variety in a truely unique manner - incredible.
  
  
• PS3 exclusive, build by a passionate studio of gamers. All bodes well for a true landmark game.
  
  
• A single player campaign as well as the multiplayer gem we hunger for - bonus!
  
  
• A built-in calendar for scheduling games with clans, friends etc. It's about time someone thought of this. I really appreciated the Warhawk style game listing, I hope they keep a version of this as well (you could join a popular server rotating maps/modes to suit, or have a custom private game, dive in on something/someone who looks good, or host a game of your choice if you have the bandwidth). The auto matchmaking of most console games is so dull.
  
  
• The Hawks RULE. Check the videos. Oh, the jeeps look tight too, plus there is a promise of a tank equivalent. No news on dropships, jetpacks, APCs etc, but we can all see there will be plenty of exciting choice, all nicely balanced.
  
  
• The weapons system from Warhawk (d-pad selection of 8/more choices) is in place, as is weapon pickup spawn points on the map. This worked before and will again, ace.

The Bad News:

• "sometime in 2012"
  

Look for yourself:

• Tuffcub's hands on from TheSixthAxis and his interview with Senior Producer Harvard Bonin.
  
  
• Official site (home to nice stills and the one official video)
  
  
• GTTV interview and some great footage (across several parts of the whole show)

This is not it, I wonder what this is

MrJimmy summary:

Long wait, but boy am I a happy camper *does little dance *

Dont Stop Believing (in PSN)

For my own little Haruhi Suzumiya.. ;) There's more to life than being online.

What did you get done?

OK we've avoided the bleeding obvious PSN=poo debate here, but now it's almost time to switch on the new boxes at Sony HQ, let's all show what we've got done while the network took a well deserved hiatus.

Just before I list what I done did, I will say this: governments and massive corporations get hacked, most of these go undiscovered or covered up, so I say well done Sony for taking the high ground. The PSN has been super reliable for the most part, this was a right kicking but hey, shit happens, and it'll come back just fine shortly - there, that's better, vented.

• Completed: Dead Nation on Grim
• Completed: Portal 2 Single Player
• 30% done: painting the house (mock tutor i.e. black wood white plaster)
• Started: bit of gardening
• Done: fitted a water butt in the garden (it's fun sawing chunks out of drainpipes)
• Done: awesome and massive joint kids/wife birthday party
• Completed: tidied the legendary attic room, now usable again
• Completed: sorted out the garage (can now find all my tools again)
• Done: Got the old Amiga 500 up and running (damn games take a long time to load)
• Done: got the Amiga MIDI sequencer and Casio FZ1 sampler out to play some old beats
• 70% done: set up some modern audio software to make some new beats
• Started: mission 'fight the flab'. OK stopped again, but started!

I've really missed having PSN at my beck and call, but it's been good to escape the lure. It's so easy to waste hours plugging away on PS3, but I'm pretty satisfied with the other stuff I've got done without it. My work has been minimal lately, so that's contributed too (might be looking for a job soon) but at least half of the above would not have happened without the PSN outage!

OK, your turn, 'fess up below...

No, Not My New Tattoo

The Move vs Kinect Review

I found this review on SixthAxis interesting, Virtua Tennis 4 on PS3/Move and 360/Kinect. I wasn't surprised by the results, Move gets a thumbs up and Kinext a thumbs down, on a title that should showcase both technologies perfectly. Mwa ha haaaaaaaaa.

The Sony Song - Portal Parody

Sums up the situation rather well. Latest official Sony blog post actually gives the details we all needed. I was hoping we'd be back up before we weekend, doesn't look likely though.

Unofficial DiRT3 Trailer/Movie

Yes, it does do telly, weary Sony tells UK

ELECTRONICS giant Sony has grudgingly responded to the British public's single question about its sophisticated new tablet computer.

Sony's highly advanced new S1 machine uses Google's Android 3.0 operating system alongside impressive technical specifications including state-of-the-art core technology that allows it to decode 1080p h264 content.

But the corporation held a special UK press conference last night to confirm the only attribute of the device that really matters to the British people.

A spokesman said: “In response to the thousands of emails, letters and burger wrappers with crayon writing on them that we have received from the United Kingdom, I am forced to confirm that this cutting-edge machine, which was years in development with some of the finest minds our industry has ever seen, does do telly.

"For clarity's sake, this includes the dancing. And the skating.

"And, yes, also the boobies.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I just have to go and kill myself.”

British citizen Tom Logan said: “I think he say it do telly. But me not sure. He say other long words too, make head hurt.

"Do not get me wrong. Me want thing. It shiny. But what if me buy then it no do telly?

"Then me angry, smash shop with stick.”

UK-based technology journalist Emma Bradford said: “It's terribly depressing that whenever a potentially revolutionary piece of technology hits the market, we as a nation simply grunt, 'do it do telly'?

"The question we should be asking is 'do it do telly better than other thing?'.

posted by Mobiletone and the ever sexy FuzzBox from a vast floating bastard huge boat off the coast of Cuba having fleeced $2 from every PSN account and channelled it into an offshore bank account. Codename: Rebug has turned out to be an absolute success netting around £100,000,000 UKP. I love it when a plan comes together. ;)

So Bad It's Practically Great

I can recommend watching some Harry Partridge 'toons, they're fun. As for the upcoming holiday weekend looks like i'll be spending it painting etc Rach's new flat. new homes, new beginnings and all that stuff hey... change... meh... women, they haz me wrapped around teh fingerz!

i know she said 'dirty weekend' but being covered in paint and plaster dust wasn't what i had in mind ;)

sorry about that lack of updates

what with work lately, a gig for the ***** Royal Dockyard digitising a bunch of drawings etc, seeing the little woman (think of a weirder prettier older version of lilly allen, she is an allen too! woot - that would explain the similarities in looks i guess), her 15yr old son got done for bricking a bl00dy shop window last week! *rolls eyes*. also the nice weather has me out on my bike a lot and it seems the only thing i get to play is PKM white during my breaks and some GT5 when i'm home.

i know there's a ton of decent stuff around at the moment, but IRL is handing out better trophies ;D

Post 666 : I Just Did A Sex Wee

WANT! http://www.commodoreusa.net/CUSA_C64.aspx

The only sports title (without cars) that I've ever loved...

... is coming back. SSX. Usual fanboy rubbish all over tinternet due to lack of visuals, here is our first proper info.

I have one request only - I want Mix Master Mike on the playlist :)

8 bit Gran Turismo 5 makes me happy

Zero Punctuation: Dragon Age

+100 for sneaking a Norwich mention into the review :D

GoTY: Teaser Trailer

BANANA

It Must Be Summer - Aussie F1 Qualifying

Sitting here at daft o'clock watching the qualifying, Lotus bombed out, ugh! But hey watching F1 is like playing GT5 no? As you probably know i got my 42" 3D LG yesterday and am really chuffed with it, that size seems to be the perfect size for my room set-up. The picture when you give it an HD feed just excels. very impressed. Took me a while of fiddling to suss out all the settings and program in some picture modes.

Good points about TV, beautiful picture quality, no sign of input lag, pretty good sound from 'invisible' speakers, the boot up light on the face panel (am easily pleased) and it's tiny thin! about 30mm, handles 3D wonderfully.

Bad points, no headphone socket, doesn't do 2D to 3D conversion despite being told it did. you can run side by side etc 3D video files off a flash drive though, downloaded a few to test it last night. can load 3d photos that way too.

Gaming: OK, i tried KZ3 and it does look good running in 3D despite some middle ground ghosting which is down to the game not the TV, but after a bit you don't notice it much, i was looking for niggles while playing the demo. The gun looks nice and solid and feels right when you sight aim, the hud sits on what would be the front of the screen and teh action takes place 'in' the screen mostly.

GT5: Still fiddling with the settings but i think i have depth set to 6 and convergence at .17 or something, The in-car view looks right and it felt like a could reach out and adjust the air vents in the dash :) some ghosting on gloves. bumper cam with the analogue dials is impressive as the dials seem to float, bonnet/roof cam, the one i use a lot thanks to standard cars shows off the depth on the track, noticed some ghosting on the white track lines at times, nothing to worry about.

Motorstorm 3D demos: tried these out earlier in the day, the TV handled all the fast motion a treat, just gave the whole thing a more solid feeling, dirt and stuff comes out of the screen behind your vehicle, nice.

Movies: only tried it with Piranha so far, will be renting a couple out later today, good clean picture and 3d effect, nothing to quibble about.

giving Ridge Racer 7 a go later as that got a 3D patch some time back.

PS3 3D set up is as easy as checking automatic in the display options and setting your screen size. not sure how telling it your screen is bigger or smaller than it actually is will effect 3D, may fiddle with that later too. Ghosting only seems to show it's head when you get areas of white near a dark colour but this is due to the tech rather than anything else and is pretty much unavoidable.

Dont forget to adjust your clock tomorrow.

3DS Launch Day

Does M3i Zero flash card support N3DS? The answer is YES if you update your firmware today [download here] so now you can carry on enjoying your 'back-ups' of your favorite games on Nintys new handheld system.

Not got yourself a M3i Zero and want to know just what they do, then hit up the cards page [here] item shipped next day from our converted Umbrella Corporation oil tanker floating just off the south coast of England.



now back to our scheduled programming....

Epic Is Too Small A Word

‘Shaken Manchild Syndrome’

Science less than a decade away from fully operational printer

22-03-11

SCIENTISTS will soon develop a home copying machine that is not an absolute pain in the arse, it has been claimed.

This one's good for taking up space and bumping into while carrying hot tea

As experts perfected a method for 'printing' three dimensional objects, the Institute for Studies said the only obstacle now was making a printer to print them with.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: "If printer design continues to advance at the current rate, it's likely we'll see a machine that isn't fundamentally incompatible with plain white A4 paper by the year 2021.

"Then we're just a few years away from something that isn't a shit-sucking bastard fucker with the sheer brass balls to describe itself as a printer."

He added: "One leading manufacturer already has a prototype machine, the MasterPrint500, that can successfully print documents of up to 12 pages only 11 of which look like they've been vomited by a child.

"You should see it. Paper goes in plain, paper comes out printed, with only slightly less than 9% reliability. It only needs to become a bit more than 11 times as good and that's us totally sorted for printing."

Stephen Malley, managing director of MasterPrint, said: "It will even accept normal non-printer paper that hasn't been through the special printerisation process that makes it printerified.

"And instead of having its 'drivers' on multiple CDs that disappear into the realm of fairies two hours after you first open the box, you can just plug the thing into a computer and it works."

He said: "Of course, one week after this printer is released we will discontinue its ink cartridges.

"No-one will know why."

this post has nothing to do with an engineer visit tomorrow and a 800 quid bill to fit a new gearbox to on of my printers at work, on the upside the owner has promised to buy me another new machine to run in tandem, clouds and silver linings and all that. just hope i hit the deadline, could be a late night tomorrow...